I’m an American citizen: Another business class story…

I figure it is no longer news that I was in Nigeria for my beloved auny’s funeral. When I was ready to leave, I was billed to fly on the 26th, and I had a ticket (duh, lol). On the day, I got to the airport, shout out to Ace for instilling the ‘check-in at home’ culture in me. Anyways, so I got to the airport, my father’s friend helped me with my luggage, and I went to board, heart-broken at leaving Boo Boo (as always). By the way, he’s such a big boy now, the proud owner of a hefty collection of words! He says ‘mama, papa, aunty (whoop), m-e-e m-e-e (leave me), no (for some reason he shouts it, can’t just say it), te te (thank you), and eeya(sweet, heartwarming sound he makes when he gives hugs). My boy is the cutest, smartest, geezer on earth! And he’s exactly fifteen months old today!

Anyway, so I boarded, walked to the economy section and my seat, and there was a lady sat in it. I wasn’t surprised, I’d been told that Lufthansa had network issues so the officials had written out seat numbers. I greeted the lady and said in my nicest voice that she was in my seat and if she had the same seat number. She put on an American accent (I say put on because as I walked up to her she was speaking Igbo to someone on the phone) and said she couldn’t have been in the wrong seat.

The natural next thing to do would be to produce your boarding ticket right? Well she started rummaging through her bag, and err, it seemed like she couldn’t find it. She asked to see mine. I showed her and then she said, “this is my seat, they probably made a mistake with the allocation”. I, innocently thinking that she was reasoning with me (bear in mind she was obviously much older than my ‘humble’ self), said, “yes, surely they have. Have you found your pass?”

Then she goes (in a slightly louder voice), ” I wasn’t lying about being allocated this seat, I’m an American citizen; I just can’t find my boarding pass.” Immediately I was disgusted. Americans don’t lie? What does being American have to do with a ‘blaady’ seat? I just turned and walked away, met a hostess and explained (kicking myself for spending so much time bandying words with the ‘American’). The hostess apologised, admitted stuff was crazy because of the network issues and said she’d sort me out.

While I was waiting, I rang my folks to tell them, and God bless them, they said they wouldn’t go to bed till I was seated, regardless of anything I said. Daddy said I was going to get upgraded, but I was so tired I would have happily shared space with my luggage, and I didn’t want to raise my hopes for nothing.

Anyway, so I waited a bit and then the hostess came back and asked, “how many of you?” Lol, in my mind i thought, ‘just in case I have another human being in my handbag abi?” I smiled though and said it was just me, then she asked me to follow her, and boom!! Business class baby! Whoop!

I learned something – most times people will be nicer to you if you smile at them. ‘Most’ because smiles and niceties don’t work on some people, like the American who cannot lie!

 

P:S – Boo Boo knows even more words, he’s actually stringing proper sentences together now! I rang and when my sister put him on the phone, he said, ‘to˙ te tor’ (shut the door). I love you Boo Boo!

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