Round up… trips, people, tech, you name it!

First off, two fingers in the air for period pain if you’re a lady reading this; it’s 4.40am and I’ve been up now for close to an hour because my belly is talking to me in ways I’m sure can be nicer and definitely less painful! In fact, can I get two fingers in the air from the guys as well, for obvious reasons? Done? Thank you very much.

Now that I’m awake, I started reflecting on a lot of things and first off is my round ups should be a lot more frequent! So I’ll work on that. A quick second is that I am blessed. Like, God has really crowned my year with good things, things money can buy, and the things money cannot buy. Especially the things money cannot buy! So grateful.

My niece turned six months old yesterday, and she’s an absolute beauty. Gosh! Just watching her grow, all the developments we’ve seen and continue to see, and her smiles. Sweet baby Jesus my niece’s smile can melt ice! Thank you God for such a gorgeous, healthy, happy baby!

In other baby news, our flu has cleared! So for three weeks or more Talia and I were coughing, runny noses, etc. Like cough syrup after cough syrup, one antibiotics course after the other, the flu refused to clear. At some point it occurred to me we were probably just re-infecting ourselves, lol. Glad to announce that we’re both fine now (the devil is put to shame once again, whoop)!

At the end of July I was invited to #TechPlus2016 to speak; had been pencilled down for two panels – one on cyberbullying, internet security in the age of social media, and the other one on increasing digital literacy for women. Both panels featured very interesting panelists, and I enjoyed speaking about TechHer, things we do, lessons we’ve learned and how they intersect with the topics.

So my friend Nana was a panelist as well, and so we were in Lagos together. I’ll attempt to chronicle the trip.

First off, that morning our flight was scheduled for 9.30am, and I had a prior engagement for 7.15am on NTA (Nigerian Television Authority) to talk about social media, entrepreneurship, etc. As you can imagine I had to be up really early to pack, head to the station to say my piece, and then sped off to the airport… Found a really nice, safe, but quick cabbie to drive me, and of course we’d detailed one of our friends working at the airport to check us in.

He calls and says that our tickets were for the 22nd of August, not the 22nd of July. W-H-A-T? And so the calls began to the organizers, they called the travel agents who booked the flight, we spoke to the airline, plenty talk. From no seats on any flight that day, to none for our class of ticket, to rescheduling us to a 10am flight that got delayed till 1pm.

We went into a restaurant to wait and encountered a very rude, uncouth man. Fathers and mothers, train your sons. Some things are unacceptable, including raising your voice or trading insults. Am I perfect? No, but in the last few days I’ve met some very uncultured young men. It is shameful.

Anyway, we finally took off about 1pm, and got into Lagos safely (praise God for that). Soon as we touched down, we were in the able hands and care of the #TechPlus2016 team, and I must take a full moment to appreciate the warmth and stellar logistics ground team they had in place to cater to us.

Got to the hotel, checked in, and barely had enough time to freshen up and head to my first panel. Interesting, intimate, just the way I liked it. Was nice to bump into my brother Chude on the way in…always a joy to see that man.

Panel done, we explored the exhibition area and I was so impressed! As a child of God planning an exhibition for TechHer myself, there was so much to be impressed by! We will get there, and very soon! I copped a ring, some bangles, and some gorgeous fabric, and I can’t wait to see what my designer #NitazCouture does with it! Been a long time since a designer/seamstress/tailor excited me, and it’s so refreshing that Francesca, head honcho at #Nitaz not only knows her craft, she knows my body and what works. So great!

Next day was easy. My session was about 4pm but we went to Nana’s session at 2pm and wandered off into the exhibition area again. We attended a few other sessions, including one with Teju Ajani, Frank Donga, and a few other people. Interesting how content is so dynamic but totally reliant on the principle of relatability. Can people relate with what you’re going to put out as a producer or curator? If it’s a yes, you’re on the road to doing well!

Sunday morning I worshipped with Pastor Ituah Ighodalo’s church, Trinity House. Amazing! It was the sixth anniversary of the church, and I remember the prayer his wife led, both in thanksgiving and committing the rest of the year into God’s hands. God is amazing I tell you. I had a great time, and I must visit again. By the way, their choir is amazing! Something the choir sang resonated with me so much, “my status is changing, no more decline, I’m on my way to better days”. In Jesus name!

Then, it was a dash back to the hotel to grab our bags and head to the airport. Airline? Arik. And that means that is a totally different article by itself. I’ll write it!

#31Days31Writers: @Kaelo says “You’re either a friend….or you’re not “

Yay!!! I’ve got Chuka on today! Whoop! Chuka is special, not because his first name takes half of my father’s first name, not because he’s super cute (cough), but because he’s intelligent, and kind, and caring. And married o, before anyone gets any ideas!

Ah ha. As I was saying, Chuka’s a lawyer, and I remember meeting him on a trip to Lagos in 2013; was it 2013 or 2014 Chuka while I was in a meeting with Chude and Debola in one restaurant somewhere in/on Victoria Island. Don’t think we spoke for more than 15 minutes, but we’ve been friends since then, and I’m thankful he’s graced my blog today.

I agree with the words on friendship, and had to take some difficult bites of those this year myself; thankful however because really, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And wiser.

Rise… Fall… Dominate… Repeat

Lessons for the lucky, are words from the wise and experienced, who were not so lucky. 2015 was an interesting year for me and perhaps I use the word “interesting” loosely but it certainly was. The thrills were unending and the lessons came in torrents (lol…pun unintended).

It started like dawn, with the sun peaking out from beneath the veil of darkness that had earmarked the end of my 2014. It was beautiful and held promise. Looking back at my year, I dare say, it was a good year.

My biggest lesson was most definitely valuing second chances. No other element breathes life into anything than the chance to actually live again and for me, I learned real quick, the importance of starting over. Almost always looks like the longest thing ever, and sometimes it can be the least desirable option. However, through a year that had it’s annoying turns with trust tossed in the year and hard questions asked, I learnt to value the importance of second chances.

Winding down the year, and getting in on the final lap, what I’m most grateful for? Friends. I’ve never been one to have close friends and not so close friends. The dichotomy is tiring. You’re either a friend….or you’re not. There can never be a middle ground with something as incredibly important as friendship.

Through a rather strange storm, I found that sifting through the chaff of acquaintances was incredibly simple and while disappointing, it is something that I’m unendingly grateful for. I found that sacrifice was something I had taken for granted and realised that the act of true friendship must not only be unforgotten but must be repaid without consideration of measure. Friendship is rare and one must sail seas to ensure that a warm connection with a friend so true is salvaged and protected at all times.

Many a time, in my lifetime… I’ve been asked about what I would undo if I had the chance. The answer was “absolutely nothing”…until quite recently. The one thing I’d like to change is something that can never be undone. Death will be a part of us as keenly as life and I have no desire to dwell on what is beyond my control (regardless of how ecclesiastical I consider myself…lol).

So, there it is. I actually enjoyed writing this. Now the arduous task of avoiding the gaps of food poisoning while making Christmas lunch for my family awaits me.

Merry Christmas

Chukwukaelo Ajuluchukwu
Nigerian
Lekki Phase 1

 

Merry Christmas to you my dear, and to your Mrs; shame I missed the turn up on the 26th! Here’s to a fabulous 2016, stripped of every form of bullshit. 

EiE at 5, happy birthday!

Thinking of what we now know as Enough is Enough Nigeria always leaves me with three feelings

1. Pride – that I was a part of something whose influence transcends the shores of this country
2. Despair – that five years after, the issues that gave birth to are still the issues we’re grappling with now
3. Hope – that there is hope for Nigeria, and our labor will not be in vain.

It was one email, one random Friday afternoon. Late President Yar’adua was terminally ill, unavailable to lead the country, and so many ‘leaders’ arose and plundered, taking turns to rape an already battered country. No one could ascertain whether he was alive or dead, no one had access to him, and there was no talk of a succession plan because some people had sworn they would rule by proxy.

And then I got that email from Chude, asking “where is the outrage;” wondering how Nigeria’s youth demographic, about 65% of Nigeria’s 150 million strong population, was going to stand by and do nothing while evil doers ensured there was no Nigeria left for us. My favorite line from that email was, “We are in the majority. We have the power to actually make change happen. So what is our excuse? What will we tell our children – that we lay down and took whatever they hit us with?”

We couldn’t have been more than 20 copied in that email that led to the ‘Enough is Enough’ protest to the National Assembly on the 16^th of March 2010.

Photo credit: Enough is Enough Nigeria

I remember the nights leading to it; the nocturnal meetings, and the letters we wrote. I remember all of us having to make the decision not to join the ‘Save Nigeria Group’ rally which held around the same time, refusing to be the ‘pop culture element’ but making a statement of our own. I remember reading up on the possible things that could go wrong during a protest, and gathering tips like onions countering the effects of teargas. Now that I think of it, I wonder what would have happened if we really had to use onions on the day.

And so on this day, exactly five years ago, I was at my cubicle at the BBC, having received a stern warning from my late aunt (God rest her soul), not to join any protest. Matter of fact, she’d made me wear a skirt and heels to work so I wouldn’t be able to go.

At 9am, my colleagues Alkasim and Matilda, disappeared from the office for various reasons, but I stayed, trying to be obedient. By 10am another colleague asked me to leave because I wasn’t being useful; that’s how restless I was. I caught a cab home, changed into trousers and my Enough is Enough tee (which I still have), and ran to Eagle Square.

The most beautiful rainbow kissed the clouds that morning, and I remember a few of us getting emotional because God was literally smiling down on us.

And then we set out, voices and placards raised, demanding that our government keep the promise they made about 6000MW of electricity, and stop the fuel crisis that was the stuff of legend.

There were many moments I will never forget from that morning, like Dele Momodu pushing through the human barrier the soldiers formed on the way to the National Assembly, Audu Maikori almost getting shot, and the absolutely scorching sun. I also remember musicians like Omawumi and others leading us in song, and I remember almost falling out of one of the trucks. I remember the Sergeant-at-Arms saying he wasn’t aware of our gathering and procession, when he had in fact received a letter days before. And yes, I remember Alkasim, Matilda, and I almost getting queried for leaving the office.

Photo credit: TalkNaija.com

From ‘Enougha Enougha’ on Facebook, Enough is Enough was registered (in a very roundabout way that still makes me smile), and through the Register, Select, Vote, and Protect (RSVP), #ShineYourEye, #OurNass, election debates and monitoring, Revoda, etc. continues to work with other organizations (local and international) to ask questions of our leaders, and demand some sanity in the chaos that is sometimes us.

That protest laid the foundation for the #OccupyNigeria and #BringBackOurGirls movements, simply because it showed that young people are aware, care, and dare to force good governance from those who have the privilege to serve.

Here’s a big happy birthday to EiE, to the inaugural board and leadership, and to Yemi Adamolekun, who has steadily steered this ship through it all. May our oil never run dry, our arms never go weary, and may we see this Nigeria we dream of sooner than later.

Happy birthday!

That marathon week (or weekend) in May!

Thank God for strength, safety and the miraculous way He alone refreshes our bodies when we sleep! Like, I’ve never been more grateful for those three before, I’m more than grateful today!

Somehow I had a really quiet month of April, spent in Abuja, sometimes wondering if things would work out the way I had planned or not. Some days I was downcast, disillusioned, fit in any related words that start with a ‘D’ if you please.

And then May came, and I started to see some light. Started with finding someone interested in some work I want to do, the first person to be even remotely interested in over 7 months of searching. Amazing!

May also brought a lot of clarity as far as my emotions are concerned. I could truly smile, pick up and move on without a certain fear that had tugged at my heartstrings since the beginning of the year/

Maybe all of this happened because this is my birth month? Maybe God in His infinite mercies smiled at me, decided to start my birthday pressies early! I’m so grateful!

As far as trips are concerned, May has been the craziest so far – truly the craziest. First it was off to Birmingham for the second weekend of the Women, Leadership, and Change residency for Diasporan women. It was an amazing weekend with the ‘Power 14’, a good time for me to catch my breath, and I’m super excited at what we’ve planned and will do with our new partnership!

Then it was off to Hinton-in-the-Hedges, somewhere in Northamptonshire to celebrate my birthday by jumping out of the sky! Whoop! Truly amazing!

Back to Abuja two days after, and in Lagos the next day for Chude Jideonwo’s book launch.

A little about the flight to Lagos shall we? I got to the airport, checked in, and for a 7pm flight, we started boarding by 6.45pm. While I was pondering about the darkening clouds, the captain, standing the doorway said we should enter quickly cos if the rain started we would be delayed by an hour. In my mind I thought, “surely if you wanted to leave early the flight should have started boarding a little earlier. SMH.” Then I looked at both my arms to see if my wings had been activated so I could fly over the other passengers to get to my seat. Tueh.

And then the voice of the announcer came on, doing the security drill and all. She was so incoherent at first I thought she was singing a traditional number and had forgotten the mic on. And then I heard, ‘HEGZIT’, and I’m sorry but I chuckled the minute I realized what she was trying to say.

50 minutes later, we touched down (thank you Lord), and it was off to a drink with a friend, and then off to spend to start a really fun weekend at my sister girl’s house! Francesca is several shades of amazing, thank you for being such an amazing host!

The end of the flight bit, so let’s ‘hegzit’ and go back to the book launch! J

Chude is a friend, boss, and someone I’m super proud of, and his book, “Are We The Turning Point Generation” is a must read! It’s a collection of essays written over seven years, and Oby Ezekwesili described it aptly in her keynote address at the event when she said, “welcome to a new Nigeria through the eyes of Chude Jideonwo”. Truly inspiring, this young man.

I actually wrote this piece on board a flight to Abuja on Monday morning, the day after the launch, for a meeting I only decided to attend that morning. Then, I ran back to Lagos that evening, and it was off to Blighty!

Got in the next morning, and it was off to The Hague, which is where this post ends, and my chronicles from The Hague begin!

*Written on the 26th of May*

Related articles

• AWF Hosts Jideonwo, Kolawole and Olufeta
• DAY 1: The first in the ‘a post a day’ series – Chude Jideonwo
• ‘Are We The Turning Point Generation? By Chude Jideonwo will be Launched this Sunday.

Of sermons, birthday’s and some – what I did on the 16th of March!

So the 16^th of March was Chude’s birthday (his 29^th), and he was in London so it was inevitable that my day would revolve around celebrations of some sort. Only snag was, up till a few days to the day, we didn’t quite know what we wanted to do!

Lunch at a friends, lunch at a restaurant, party? We didn’t know. Next thing we knew it was a couple nights before and so we said we’d go to church, thank God for the new year, and then we’d be up for anything that followed.

Sunday morning we all made it to Jesus House (which is like the headquarters for The Redeemed Christian Church of God in London), and it so reminded me of House on The Rock in Abuja, there’s nothing like well-produced music! I mean I know it doesn’t happen that way but sometimes I think the better sounding the production, the further in front your praises are in the line to the Lord!

Then I heard Rev Adeboye was in the service, and it was like the kiss of my life! Daddy G.O was in church? Ahh, and we had planned to go for some other service before? Not sure I would have forgiven myself! I was extra expectant, I just knew God was going to bring a great word of peace to me.

Anyone who knows Daddy Adeboye knows he is soft-spoken, for me it is one of his most endearing qualities – all this ‘noise’’ in churches sometimes sha, SMH – I feel like I listen more when I’m not distracted by the minister yelling.

He said a short prayer, and then he went right into it. Reading from 1 Samuel 7:12, Romans 8:28, and 1 Thessalonians 5: 18, he talked about the ups and downs in our lives as being proof that we were truly living. He said, “when you take a heart test at the hospital, a flat line is never a good thing, it indicates death. A healthy heart has ups and downs”.

There were three questions too, designed to make us reflect on our lives, our walk with God, and generally the things we get up to.

1. Where am I on this journey? Hebrews 12:1. Am I where God wants me to be?
2. How much time do I have left? Joshua 13:1
3. How will I end?

He said two interesting things about pride and the feeling of ‘I have arrived’. He said it takes 3 days to get to the moon but 4 and half years to get to Mars – what have you achieved that’s making your shoulders higher than your head?

Then he prayed, ahh!! Told us to pray for a birthday blessing for ourselves too, and after leading people to Christ, he was gone. Apparently, he stopped over (enroute another country), just for the service. Bless him!

After the service (and cornering Pastor Agu Irukwu – thanks Yemi – to pray for Chude), it was off for another celebration at Anino’s cousin’s place. Lol, no see waka that day!

My Momma spoke with and prayed for Chude, Anino’s Momma sang and prayed for him too (how/why that reduced me to tears I will never understand but it did) and then it was time to eat!

PS – Anino’s momma is a darling and half! Love her to bits!

So, we ate, drank, literally stuffed our faces with food (while counting calories of course, lol), and then it was time to head home. There was lots of singing in the car as Anino’s momma dropped us at the station, and there were some lovely Ellen-inspired selfies too!

Amazing day, I got home and literally passed out! Happy birthday Chude!

PS – here’s his account of his day here.

 

Related articles

• Happy Birthday, Momma!
• A Shout Out To My Momma.
• Coming soon: Are We The Turning Point Generation. A Collection of Essays by Chude Jideonwo

All the writers; all their topics: 31 days of precious 2013 moments!

You know how this idea for the #31days31writers project started? To start with I know YNaija’s done something like that in 2012, I think I wrote for that sef. I did! It was an article on babes beefing each other for no reason, and you won’t believe the gender that bashed me the most on that piece? Lol!

For this one though, I saw someone tweet in November (I swear I don’t remember their handle and I’m on a Twitter fast so I can’t go look) but he was talking about it and I thought, this might be cool for the end of the year. I didn’t act on it though till the 26th of November, and then I gave all my writers till the 28th to hand in their pieces. With benefit of hindsight, it must have a freaked a number of them out!

Anyway, so I must have asked 40 people, and out of those I got 30. And I am more than grateful that they took the time to squeeze their 2013 into 600 words, and send in the lovely pictures they did. From castration for sex offenders, to faith in the Lord, rebuilt confidence, loyalty from friends, second chances, to resolutions for the new year, homosexuality and homophobia, 2013 was different for every one of my writers, and I am so proud of them!!

Did you miss any of the articles? Well, you’re welcome, I’ve listed all of them below!

1. DAY 1: The first in the ‘a post a day’ series – Chude Jideonwo
2. “I learned that I matter” – Francine! #31days31writers
3. “I have learnt pain is a part of the process” – Emeka #31days31writers
4. “I use writing as a tool to make a difference” – Chijioke #31days31writers
5. “No more Mr Nice Guy” – Mr Mobility! #31days 31 writers
6. “I’m thankful for stability” – Saratu #31days 31writers
7. “I would shut up and let her do her mothering” – Vickie Remoe #31days31writers
8. “The internet lives” – Pa Ikhide starts the second week of my #31days31writers project!
9. “I am gradually learning to love the silence” – Dosh Mabonga! #31days31writers
10. “I have learnt that dreams can actually come true” – Bisi Alimi #31days31writers
11. “I learnt to let go and forgive” – Onaedo!! #31days31writers
12. “I have learnt that light always comes at dawn” – Alkayy!! #31days31writers
13. “Who says black men shouldn’t cry?” – My girl Francesca Uriri! #31days31writers
14. “Our human species have truly trashed the planet” – Jeremy!! #31Days31Writers
15. “2013: Of numbers, expectations and unspoken promises” – Dami #31Days31Writers
16. “I won the lottery!!” – Tolu #31days31writers
17. “I’ve learnt to let go and let God” – the delectable Nike Coker! #31Days31Writers
18. “People change and so do you” – Ewoma gives us home truths! #31days31writers
19. “Castration as an act of mercy” – My girl Zima goes hard! #31days31writers
20. “I learnt a lot about public engagement as a public servant” – Ohimai!! #31Days31Writers
21. “I live and breathe food” – Nky Iweka #31days31writers
22. “I have so much to be grateful for!” – Mac-Jordan #31Days31Writers
23. “I’m glad that I followed my intuition and took risks” – Chris!! #31Days31Writers
24. “This year taught me to represent” – Eziaha (The Fab Sister) is up today! #31days31writers
25. “Loyalty makes a friend family” – Nonso’s up for our Christmas special! #31days31writers
26. “I have come to love and accept myself” – my bestie is up! #31days31writers
27. “I don’t even remember my resolutions for 2013″ – Andy Madaki on #31days31writers
28. “I have learnt that homosexuality exists in 450 species” – Okechukwu is a shining star on #31days31writers today!
29. “I understood faith as a lifestyle this year” – Lizzie
30. “Your friend is your need answered” – a surprise appearance on the #31days31writers project!
31. “Thank you for being part of my 2013″ – Guess who? Me!!!

Thank you guys for honoring me and my blog. Best wishes for the new year!

Love, light, and God’s many blessings!

Mwah!

DAY 1: The first in the ‘a post a day’ series – Chude Jideonwo

Hello!!!

So I’m totally excited about this little project I’ve got going this month, which is opening up my blog to 31 people, every day of this month! What they’ll talk about is here, and who better to start with than my friend, brother, and boss, Chude Jideonwo!

I learnt the truth about the road less travelled

My name is Chude Jideonwo, I am Nigerian, and I run an innovative media company that seeks to empower an evolving generation – of Africans. Which is pretty frightening sometimes, because I always knew I would be a journalist, but I never thought I would be flying without wings – as an entrepreneur.

This has been a remarkable year – remarkable because it threw up the kinds of battles I had read about but never quite understood. Just last year, a dear friend of mine had said to me ‘You haven’t even started. No one has really stolen your money and run away, betrayed you so deeply, you can’t imagine it. When that has happened, come back to me, I will know your journey has started.”

I said ‘God forbid’, as I am wont to, but she had insisted – God won’t forbid this, it is the way He has made the world.

I haven’t quite experienced to the scale that she speaks, and even till now my request to God that stands as my response to the thought, but I have come to a depth of understanding of what she spoke about.

This is the year that I have fought battles I never thought I would, faced moral, financial, personal conundrums I never thought I had the capacity to, opposition I didn’t think one man should face, human conduct that tested my ideas of all that is good, and many times when even I questioned my motives in the face of the odds.

I have learnt long ago to sit still and keep calm when all I want to do is scream; to keep my calm when the stakes are higher and not ever to be moved by the emotions of the moment when the vision is a longer one. This year, the limits of that lesson were tested.  Sorely, they were tested.

I learnt early that the road I have chosen will be rough, that the desire to do new things, to break a few of the rules, to change the course of things as we have met them or as we know them, to conquer my inner introvert, and my natural comfort with the status quo, and move beyond that with which I am comfortable. But no one prepares you for the twists and turns of that road. And, I found out, even you cannot prepare yourself enough. Not even if you can see into the future.

In an interview with the Financial Times a few weeks ago, Africa’s richest man, Aliko Dangote spoke of the fear that gripped his heart as he begun a new venture. How so frightened he was that he had made a mistake that he could not eat, could not sleep, could hardly move.

I dare not compare myself with such a man, but on my level I have experienced just that kind of fear, of despair, of gut-wrenching second-guessing, of a desire to turn back and run to that which is normal, and usual, and comforting.

But then I know only the road less travelled would give me joy. And, with a mix of excitement and trepidation, I realize that, because of this; because of the life I have chosen to live, this roller coaster will not end, it cannot stop.

I see men who have already done it all; who have lived a million lives but yet face obstacles so steep you wonder why they do this. And I realize, each time, there are more trials, more temptations ahead – more excruciating decisions to make, more disappointment and pain I must build the capacity to absorb, more difficult actions to be taken, nights and days spent alone in contemplation.

But I will have it no other way, and I would do none of it differently. Because to arrive at great summits, one must endure great journeys – with great girth.

My journey, in fact, has just barely begun. And I am excited at the prospects!

Chude…

Related articles

• Introducing #AlderSMR Writer: Chude Jideonwo (alderconsulting.wordpress.com)