#31Days31Writers: Matilda learned her “simplicity is her crown and her cross!”

Whoop! Our entry for today is a very dear friend who is using our hearts to do ‘tumbom tumbom’ by moving between Lagos and Abuja (don’t worry my dear you’re coming back next year)!

Tilly and I have been friends since 2008, and moved from Aso Radio to the working for the Queen (BBC World Service Trust, now Media Action) together. We’ve spent happy and sad times together, and have enjoyed many a turnup together! I’m excited that she’s on the blog today, and hope you enjoy her piece as much as I did!

I haven’t found the appropriate words to describe my year thus far. When it started, I had no resolutions nor defined plans. At the time, I was freelancing at a company where I was working for next to nothing but its attendant experience. A few friends thought I was crazy but for me it was also a period of penance -my Catholic background may have influenced this thought.

You see, I had made a judgement call late last year that cost me dearly and in Pharisee-like manner of over two thousands years past, I was handed over to be judged and I fell short. For a while I battled with self-doubt but had to  perfect the facade of ‘….’ Fortunately, my absolution came in form of a doppelgänger and she is one of the many things I am thankful for as I write. She’s fast become a mentor and friend. My confidence level now nko (you may ask), well it’s shooting through the ozone level!

I am thankful for my family; Iya Wale, Engineer, Wale, Lyna, Daniel & Daniela as well as Phil. We started the year in good health of mind and body, still are in top form and are confident in God that we will end the year happy and healthy.

I am also thankful for the realisation that my simplicity is my crown and my cross. I struggled for a while to accept this as I was often taken for granted but knowing how powerful it can be, I count this gift more than once when counting my blessings.

I am most grateful for my friends and acquaintances, too numerous to mention but especially for these two:
1. Okechukwu Jake Effoduh who has been my trusted partner, friend, cheerleader, style consultant and more rolled into one for many years. Those who know him will understand the depth of pride and admiration that fills my heart to be blessed with such a friend who is not only selfless but also grows in leaps and bounds daily.  Though we don’t see often, the expression “outta sight is outta mind” doesn’t resonate with us. #NuffSaid

2.  Omolola Faleye: her resilience and generosity I am in awe of. She’s been my guardian angel and I am thankful for her everyday and thrice on Sunday!

I am thankful for the unions of friends and births witnessed this year: for Big Mo and Willie; Franque and Oyin; Akin and Jola, Tega and Tracey – to mention a few.

I regret time spent second-guessing myself and a few epic moments when I didn’t tell someone off; they earnestly deserved it! For 2016, I wish and will work towards more laughter, a consistent walk with Christ, opportunities to travel the world and write, but most of all, ataraxia unlimited.

I am thankful for the ability to write this post for my dearest friend, Chico on my cracked-screen phone with 11% battery power on a hot night warding off mosquitoes, it means I can still feel something despite the tiredness that grips my body after a long day at a job I am most thankful for.

Laughter… Gorgeous girl…

I think I took this picture!! I should consider photography as an alternate source of income, whatchu think?

My gorgeous, happy friend! Here’s to a fabulous 2016, full of great joy, the fulfilment of all our hearts desires, and lots of egg on the faces of our enemies!

Mwah!

31 days 31 writers – yep, we’re doing it again in July!

Greetings from Barnes Close, Worcestershire, which played home to us fourteen women from different countries in Africa, being the second residency of five for Diaspora Women in England funded by the Royal Arts Society, Comic Relief, and delivered brilliantly by Jill, Amita, and Geeta of the Women, Leadership and Change program.

Wow! That was a mouthful! I’m thankful for being chosen to experience this exploration into ourselves, the study of different leadership styles, the amazing food at the Center for Peace and Reconciliation (where we are lodged), and the peace/serenity on this massive expanse of land. I’m even more grateful cos it seems like I haven’t spent more than 7 days in any place recently, and the peace, quiet, and absence of the internet is really welcome! Plus, it’s the beautiful month of May, the flowers are blooming, and the farm is really beautiful! Glory be to God I don’t have any allergies…

Now, who remembers 31 Days 31 writers from December? I know I do! From Sierra Leone to Sango Ota (not really, but I needed to use another ‘s’, lol), there was a writer everyday, telling us what their year had been like, lessons they had learned, people they were grateful to/for, and things they would do differently if they could.

One word? Ah-ma-zing! Incredible learning, it was like a 360 degrees lesson on life every time a new one was published! Old, young, big, small, I had the most the most exquisite pieces on the blog in December! Here are a couple, in no particular order.

“I would shut up and let her do her mothering” – Vickie Remoe #31days31writers

“I have learnt that homosexuality exists in 450 species” – Okechukwu is a shining star on #31days31writers today!

“I won the lottery!!” – Tolu #31days31writers

“Your friend is your need answered” – a surprise appearance on the #31days31writers project!

“I have so much to be grateful for!” – Mac-Jordan #31Days31Writers

“The internet lives” – Pa Ikhide starts the second week of my #31days31writers project!

“Who says black men shouldn’t cry?” – My girl Francesca Uriri! #31days31writers

Guess what? We’re doing it again in July! Whoop! How about an appraisal of the first six months of the year, what you’re excited about, definitely what you’re grateful for, and what you’re looking forward to as we speed to the end of 2014! I’m excited already!

I’m not sure yet if I want people who have written before to go again (so we can accommodate new voices), but I won’t say no to anyone. How’s that?

Interested? Of course you are! You can tweet me to say you’re interested (@ChiomaChuka), DM an email address if we follow each other, or simply send me an email here – dfairygodsister(at)yahoo(dot)com.

There are 20 slots, and it’s as simple as the first to get in touch get the slots! It would be absolutely fabulous if all the pieces are scheduled by the end of the month so get in touch already!

 

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All the writers; all their topics: 31 days of precious 2013 moments!

You know how this idea for the #31days31writers project started? To start with I know YNaija’s done something like that in 2012, I think I wrote for that sef. I did! It was an article on babes beefing each other for no reason, and you won’t believe the gender that bashed me the most on that piece? Lol!

For this one though, I saw someone tweet in November (I swear I don’t remember their handle and I’m on a Twitter fast so I can’t go look) but he was talking about it and I thought, this might be cool for the end of the year. I didn’t act on it though till the 26th of November, and then I gave all my writers till the 28th to hand in their pieces. With benefit of hindsight, it must have a freaked a number of them out!

Anyway, so I must have asked 40 people, and out of those I got 30. And I am more than grateful that they took the time to squeeze their 2013 into 600 words, and send in the lovely pictures they did. From castration for sex offenders, to faith in the Lord, rebuilt confidence, loyalty from friends, second chances, to resolutions for the new year, homosexuality and homophobia, 2013 was different for every one of my writers, and I am so proud of them!!

Did you miss any of the articles? Well, you’re welcome, I’ve listed all of them below!

1. DAY 1: The first in the ‘a post a day’ series – Chude Jideonwo
2. “I learned that I matter” – Francine! #31days31writers
3. “I have learnt pain is a part of the process” – Emeka #31days31writers
4. “I use writing as a tool to make a difference” – Chijioke #31days31writers
5. “No more Mr Nice Guy” – Mr Mobility! #31days 31 writers
6. “I’m thankful for stability” – Saratu #31days 31writers
7. “I would shut up and let her do her mothering” – Vickie Remoe #31days31writers
8. “The internet lives” – Pa Ikhide starts the second week of my #31days31writers project!
9. “I am gradually learning to love the silence” – Dosh Mabonga! #31days31writers
10. “I have learnt that dreams can actually come true” – Bisi Alimi #31days31writers
11. “I learnt to let go and forgive” – Onaedo!! #31days31writers
12. “I have learnt that light always comes at dawn” – Alkayy!! #31days31writers
13. “Who says black men shouldn’t cry?” – My girl Francesca Uriri! #31days31writers
14. “Our human species have truly trashed the planet” – Jeremy!! #31Days31Writers
15. “2013: Of numbers, expectations and unspoken promises” – Dami #31Days31Writers
16. “I won the lottery!!” – Tolu #31days31writers
17. “I’ve learnt to let go and let God” – the delectable Nike Coker! #31Days31Writers
18. “People change and so do you” – Ewoma gives us home truths! #31days31writers
19. “Castration as an act of mercy” – My girl Zima goes hard! #31days31writers
20. “I learnt a lot about public engagement as a public servant” – Ohimai!! #31Days31Writers
21. “I live and breathe food” – Nky Iweka #31days31writers
22. “I have so much to be grateful for!” – Mac-Jordan #31Days31Writers
23. “I’m glad that I followed my intuition and took risks” – Chris!! #31Days31Writers
24. “This year taught me to represent” – Eziaha (The Fab Sister) is up today! #31days31writers
25. “Loyalty makes a friend family” – Nonso’s up for our Christmas special! #31days31writers
26. “I have come to love and accept myself” – my bestie is up! #31days31writers
27. “I don’t even remember my resolutions for 2013″ – Andy Madaki on #31days31writers
28. “I have learnt that homosexuality exists in 450 species” – Okechukwu is a shining star on #31days31writers today!
29. “I understood faith as a lifestyle this year” – Lizzie
30. “Your friend is your need answered” – a surprise appearance on the #31days31writers project!
31. “Thank you for being part of my 2013″ – Guess who? Me!!!

Thank you guys for honoring me and my blog. Best wishes for the new year!

Love, light, and God’s many blessings!

Mwah!

“I have learnt that homosexuality exists in 450 species” – Okechukwu is a shining star on #31days31writers today!

Where do I start from with Okechukwu? I met him once in 2008, while I was still at Aso Radio, and then we became work colleagues in 2009 when I started working with the BBC World Service Trust (now Media Action). Remember the mornings with kose and bread at Amma House? The listen back sessions? The noise and camaraderie in that our production corner, how we would drive Oga Eze crazy with our chatter? Do you remember the day you played out Beyonce’s ‘Telephone’ song for us in the office? I have never heard that song since then without thinking of you!

Okechukwu is a shining light, a true example of a young man who has his sights on greatness and is doing all he can to get there. He plays hard, but there’s no gainsaying that Okechukwu words hard, and I am mega proud of him! He has a Wikipedia entry here, and he sent me his submission in hours of my asking. Rockstar!

My name is Jake Okechukwu Effoduh; I am an unrepentant Nigerian.

I anchor a national radio programme on governance under the platform of the BBC Media Action called “Talk Your Own Make Naija Better” I also serve as a Special Adviser to the Director General of the Nigerian Institute of Advanced Legal Studies where I work as a Research Fellow.

One thing I have learnt this year? Asides cramming so many statistics on human rights and minority populations, I have learnt that homosexuality exists in 450 species but homophobia exists in only one therefore without knowing a thing, one must not hate.

What I am grateful for? I am grateful to God for so many things! First, for making sure I’ve NEVER been ill for the 26 years of my existence. Second, for blessing me with a genotype that makes me immune to malaria. Third, for giving me a mighty and extraordinary appetite that has attracted a team of Israeli nutritionists who have come to Nigeria for the purpose of using me for an unprecedented survey, which I am getting paid for (although the money is very very small sha – these nutritionists and their aka gum. Lol) As for this year, I am grateful to God for my entrée into the prestigious University of Oxford on a very generous scholarship.

One thing I would do differently if I could? If I could, I would do many things differently, e.g. I would like to wear mufti to court; speak pidgin at meetings; and then most importantly: dance more on the road. The thing is, I love to take long walks with music blasting through my earpiece from my phone. For me, there is nothing more refreshing than listening to my favorite songs in the middle of the wind while in locomotion. It always induces me to bust a move, but I find myself responding to the music only when people are scarce on the road so that I don’t create a scene.

Don’t even let the serious face fool you, Okechukwu is a joke and half! And err, he is single. Is he? I don’t know o! Confirm before you start ‘busting your own moves’.

 P:S – Three days to the end of the #31days31writers project. I’m excited! It’s been an amazing ride; so many lessons, laughs, emotive moments, I will definitely do this again!