Social Media: how much have our lives changed?

My best definition of social media is people on the left, people on the right, and technology in the middle. It is the democratization of information and content, the convenience and equal opportunity to share and connect with others, and the fulfillment of “the world is a global village” prophecy.

For some, social media is a magic wand to be wielded as they please, whether positively or negatively. It is at the heart of discussions around the world, from boardrooms to houses of parliament, marketplaces to bedrooms. It is alternate reality for some, and a mask to hide behind to perpetuate falsehood, bully, or exact vengeance against others.

Social media is many things, and does many things for many people. It is the voice of the common man, the route to recourse for offended customers and the immediate audience for the citizen journalist. Depending on where you are, local and international case studies abound of people deploying their networks to bring about a desired action or reaction. Social capital has a new field of play, and the rise and rise of influencers is ignored at the peril of the social media manager or strategist.

Credit: hr-gazette.com

In Nigeria, the advent of social media broke and is still breaking many ceilings as far as communication across board is concerned but especially as it affects power. As a people we’re traditionally wired to follow or submit to constituted authority, whether in the home, in our communities, at school, at work or via our various religions; our embracing digital however disrupted all of that. The proliferation of media has provided access to global thinking, cultures, new streams of thought on the one hand, and courage for expression of existing streams of thought on the other. Questions have arisen where people weren’t questioning actions or inactions before, and those already questioning became equipped to be even louder and more visible with these questions. We are tasking government and public officials in a manner that was simply unthinkable before.

Love, relationships, and marriages have also had their share of disruption thanks to an audience constantly in need of a good ‘awww-worthy’ moment. Public displays of affection are no longer public enough if they’re not broadcast to friends, family, enemies, and complete strangers. We’re here for those moments though, egging on lovers to push the boundaries of rationality in expressing just how much they love their partner.

On the flip side, the pressure to claim that significant other and shield them from potential competitors or replacements is real, and there are studies that say social media has bred a new level of paranoia and mistrust in relationships. From sliding into private messages (also known as Direct Messages on Twitter and Instagram), to the curse of the misinterpreted emoji left as a comment, to spats that end in publishing nudes that were exchanged in times of peace, even to pedophiles grooming and then abusing teenagers (and thankfully getting their comeuppance), there’s just as much evil as there’s good online.

A little while ago, poverty porn was an issue, with international organizations attempting to clutch at our hearts (and purse) strings by depicting suffering across Africa. I was always embarrassed to watch those calls for help, especially when there would be three in a row (in whatever order); one to raise money to provide water for an African child, another to adopt a pet tiger, and another to stop cruelty to dogs. I was never comfortable with them, probably will never be.

Say hello however to Poverty Porn 2:0, the new version enabled by social media. We are in the age of philanthropy that must be broadcast to the world. And so without recourse to the dignity of the human beings in question (adults and children alike), people feel it is acceptable to film and broadcast their acts of charity. It is arguable that the publications inspire others to do good but is that really why we do it?

What is social media to you? How has it changed your life from the first social network you subscribed to?

#31Days31Writers: Isioma learned ‘people are flawed’

Turn up! We’ve successfully started inching towards the end of the second week of this #31Days31Writers series! God is a good God! Whoop! Big thank you to everyone who’s sent in an entry, left a comment, liked a post, shared on social media, thank you!

Isioma is a kind of kindred spirit to be honest… I see some of her tweets and my heart sings. We’ve never met, but I know I like her, and will like her even more if we ever meet. And she’s manager to the darlings of the film industry and each time I see her tweet about them, I just imagine they must be great, easy-to-relate-with kind of people to have her as manager.

So I saw Isioma share one of the articles from this series, and I sent her a private message asking if she would send an entry in herself. I think I got it in 30 minutes or something miraculous like that! Shaking my head at people I’ve been following for almost two years to send in their pieces!

I’ll let you get to it… I like this one!

2015 has been a year of thanksgiving, it has not been perfect and sometimes it was difficult and frustrating but overall it has been a win. In November I walked away from a pretty serious car accident. Everyone who saw the pictures of the wreck told me how lucky or blessed I was. That accident summed up my year beautifully. You see I am wonderfully and fearfully made and therefore I cannot be broken. Bent and bruised, but never broken.

My name is Isioma Osaje and I’m a child of God. I’m Nigerian, resident in Lagos, and own a company called Agency 106 Talents & Company Limited. I’m a Talent Manager/Film Producer.

2014 was challenging professionally and personally and I knew that things had to give. At the end of 2014, I told God I wanted to know Him better and live the life He had ordained for me. At the beginning of 2015 I went on a purge of sorts. I asked God to rid me of everything that was a distraction from my purpose, and boy did He go to town. I am by no means the most successful version of myself, but I’ve grown. It is refreshing to look back on the woman I was in 2014 and the one I am today.

My blessings and lessons from 2015

Blessings

1. I nurtured my spirit. I fed my spirit with the word of God religiously and made it a point of duty to spend at least an hour every day in fellowship with God. My principle this year was to improve myself, so I constantly analyzed the things about me that worked and those that need a little help. I’m imperfect and always will be, but I will never stop trying to be a better version of me.
2. I made my passion legitimate and registered my company. I’m in the business of making Kings and Queens. God has been faithful; people actually know my name and what I do!! Also my people have grown in leaps and bounds and the promise of 2016 has me so excited.
3. I became a voice. It has always been my dream to motivate and inspire people and in 2015, I finally began to do this via social media. I’ve received several calls and messages from people who read my tweets and were blessed.
4. I have the best support system and I am grateful for the people in my life who give it meaning.
5. God loves me and everything I touch shall be blessed.

Lessons

1. I learned that people are flawed. They will disappoint you and it is okay. I ditched a handful of users, because carrying people who do not add anything to your life is an unnecessary hassle.
2. Life goes on. As far as clichés go this is the most cliché statement of the lot and yet it is the most valid. No matter what is going on in your sphere of existence, life will not stop until you figure it out. At best you can call for a timeout, but you will have to get back into the ring and continue fighting.
3. Anonymity works, but some things in life require a face. I do not like or enjoy being in the public eye and if left to my own devices you would only ever know the name. Unfortunately we live in a world that is pretty jaded and people may sometimes need to see that you’re real to buy into your vision. Enjoy or at least learn to tolerate the spotlight.
4. I am happiest when I help people achieve their dreams, so I was constantly supporting anything and everyone. This in the long run is counter-productive because you only have so much to give. In 2015 I learned to differentiate between acquaintances, friends and others. I still give 100% of myself to anything or anyone I’m committed to, but I learned the hard way to only commit myself to people who ask and will appreciate it and to causes that leave me blessed.
5. GOD is enough. Trust in Him and He will give you everything that you need.

Yes Mami, God is enough! I can’t even find the words to do a recap because I feel I will just repost the entire article! Thank you Isioma for writing in, and here’s to a fabulous 2016!

Women in tech, young people in business, whatever

Who has noticed I’ve got my groove back? Whoop!!

Very recently I wrote about being almost subsumed by work, stress, and so many emotions that made it difficult to write. Guess what? I’m back! Whoop! Slowly catching up with most of my writing commitments, and oh what a joy!

Thank you Jesus!

So let’s talk about something that happened recently which I’m very concerned by, especially since it has happened before. Before I start though, quick question: what’s the most important thing for you when you apply for a position/job/project/whatever?

For me, it’s knowing all I can about the people hiring. It’s like dating ( by the way, I refer to relationships so much these days I think an Agony Aunt column is in my future) and if you don’t get to know your partner, how can you please them (or at least try)?

Agreed? Not saying that’s all you need to look out for but believe me when I say it’s important. Very important.

Second thing for me is that I need to care enough/want it bad enough, otherwise there is no point. I won’t get it. To be clear, I haven’t been accepted everywhere I applied for a job, matter of fact there was a research project I put in for a couple weeks ago with a team, and we didn’t get chosen. We did get great feedback though, on what we did right and wrong, so much as I really wanted us to win the tender, I’m not beating myself up at all.

Anyway, back to talking about other people. Lol.

For about two years I’ve recruited ad hoc or full-time staff for myself and for clients, and so I’ve gone through a number of CV’s. And that’s what this post is about. The entire gamut around securing a job, from sending a CV to the interview, to negotiating your pay, to whatever comes after. I know we all talk about the scarcity of jobs, and the difficulties around women finding and being in work but have we thought about employability?

A month ago I needed two researchers and so I asked on Twitter – and most times I will tweet about positions I need to fill – that people send CV’s and a link to anything they had written to an email address.

I got the weirdest responses. From the guy who addressed me as “Hi Chi” (forget the inappropriateness of the salutation, anyone who knows me knows any adaptations of ‘Chioma’ never work with me), to the person who sent me her social network names for me to ‘check her out’, then the guy who sent me a CV which had more errors than correct sentences, phew! Then there was the lady who sent me a nice CV, but then an article that was full of ‘lols’, ‘smhes’, and ‘rmes’. How do you send that as a writing sample for a research position? Who does that? Hian!

About 72 hours ago I joined a panel to interview some people for an internship position. Three guys, two ladies, and somehow the guys went first. First guy was alright, second guy maybe just a bit more qualified, and the third guy sounded like the perfect ‘bullshitter‘ (forgive that word please, I’ll explain). We asked him how he would solve a problem in our organization (which he claimed he was well aware of, and then he said he wouldn’t be able to give us an answer till he had “researched into the foundation of the issue because everything takes root at the foundation then starts to grow”. What??? You know how people just go round and round the mulberry bush because they don’t have an answer? This guy.

Anyway, it was the ladies who worried me. Greatly. The first one knew next to nothing about the organization, kept on smiling in a ‘I-don’t-know-as-much-as-I-should-but-I’m-hoping-my smile-makes-up-for-it’ kind of way, and said she didn’t use social media but had a Facebook and Twitter account. Haba!!! When social media management for the organization was there as one of the tasks? Did I mention she wore jeans and hot pink lipstick? And generally gave off a very unserious vibe?

The second lady did just a bit better but all the interviewers knew the race for the position was between the guys. The ladies were (to my mind) just there to make up the numbers.

And so it is to the sisters I write today. Do we not care enough? Is the problem that we are not aware of what we should do when we’re job-hunting or we don’t want these jobs bad enough? I don’t know. It was distressing though, super distressing. And then we’ll go to our places of worship to pray for favor when we put in ZERO effort. I don’t know…

Thoughts, anyone?

PS: Written on the 21st of March, 2015.

BrandiQ and All Souls Church – A day in the life of a strategist!

The 6th of November was a truly special day, one of those days that can truly be described as ‘full’, and I’m about to tell you how it went down! Or up, because it ended on such a high!

So, I’d flown into Lagos the night before after spending a few days with my darling parents, was truly a gift to have been with them, and I can’t stop thanking both of them for the sacrifices they make to keep me comfortable anytime I’m around!

Anyway, so I woke up that morning, chest tight, nostrils blocked, the leftover of a bad case of flu that refused to leave me alone. Show must go on abi? So I got ready, and headed to Civic Center where I’d been billed to speak alongside some very renowned speakers at the BrandiQ Symposium. My topic? Politics, social media, and young people – Tolu Ogunlesi had put me forward as a panelist cos he thought he wouldn’t be in the country and then when he found he would be around, he just came to support me. Hallelujah for friends/colleagues like him!

Keynote speaker was former UK High Commissioner Christopher Kolade, special guest of honor was the most lovely older gentleman Apostle Hayford Allile, and there were academics, other top-notch people like that. I was on the stage with people like Martins Oloja (Editor, The Guardian), and to be honest by the time he was done with his speech, the first thing I said when I took the mic was “how do you top a talk like that”? Thanks however be to God who always causes us to do brilliantly, and not shame Him, our families or our friends!

So, what did I talk about? I started with definitions of some key words in the Symposium theme, (participation, stakeholder, tokenism, and young person) and then I asked two questions:

• How many people in the room have voter cards?
• How many of us know the heads of our local government areas  (appointed or elected)?

How do we then (as young people) claim to be stakeholders in a thing we cannot participate in because we’re not registered? Really, how? Aren’t we tired of clicktivism? When do we move on to action, in this case enforcing our thoughts/ideologies with our votes?

Then it was off to stats on voting patterns, how social media is a means to an end but must not be misconstrued as the end in itself, and all of that good business. Event was great, I had a really good time! Potential client and writing gig in the offing too! Whoop!

It ended about 3pm, and then it was off to Terra Kulture for a quick lunch, dress change, and then flying down to All Souls Anglican Church in Lekki, where I’d been billed to speak on social media for play or business, from a Godly perspective.

My date was moved to the 6th because I signed up to something (which I have readied a series for) that would start on the 7th.

So I got to the venue late because I grossly underestimated the traffic and side note? Dear Lagosians, Lagos is not working! Your roads are horrible, even in the so-called posh areas. Yuck. Thankful for my Cabbie Abubakar who lives in Ajah and so knew all the hidden routes to take to avoid the traffic. Na wa!

Anyway, got there in one piece, and after the worship session, I was up! It was a small, intimate crowd, and it was structured a bit like this.

I started with 1 Corinthians 10:31 which I paraphrased as “whether you eat or drink, or tweet or Facebook, do it to the glory of God”. The rest of it is below…

• About me
• What is social media
• How do you use social media – Proverbs 27: 17, Hebrews 10:24-25
• How not to use social media – 1 Corinthians 15:33, Matthew 5:29
• Careers in/around social media – Matthew 5:16

Pretty simple/straightforward right? The interesting thing really was introducing the word of God to the different points above. I had a marvellous time! I loved the question and answer session, and I have since made a blogpost off a quick consult I did following that event! Something to do with how we use LinkedIn, you should see it.

It gets even better – they gave me a plaque! I was so emotional, it means so much to have received this! And the prayers, aww, kiss of my life!

Super grateful to JT for dinner, and then it was bedtime, and out of Lagos the next day to join the Heinrich Boll Stiftung Book Sprint in Abuja!

Crazy, crazy, schedule, but I love it!

xx

Related articles

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First quarter’s done – I testify!

So, a little backgrounder to this article. Sometime in January a friend ran a series on her blog for people to testify about their year and I sent in this piece. Somehow she didn’t get round to using it.

I was searching for some document this evening (28th March) and I stumbled on it! And so I thought I’d use it for a end-my-first-quarter type of thank you post. And so, here’s my testimony of how brilliant my year has been so far, obviously I’ve added a bit more to the original post – God has really rocked these first three months for me! The additions are in green.

Ready? Let’s do it! Whoop!

 

I Testify!!

2014! Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude! Nothing more, this is the year that God and I have agreed will be full of gratitude alone. Gratitude.

2013 was a difficult year. Ooh, very difficult. So difficult some days I was scared that one day I would do something to hurt myself. It was incredible, wearing a smile outside because people were ‘counting on me to smile’ and I didn’t want to disappoint anyone, but I was really struggling inside. Like I really struggled.

To put this in perspective, I’m not a stranger to rough patches, but I’ve always seen the good in every unpleasant situation, felt like it would get better. But when I woke up on the 21^st of July to news that my aunty Pat had passed, the term ‘numb’ came alive. Ooh it came so alive it nearly consumed me.

Can I say a big thank you to Olamide Craig (@RevDrCraig) here? I rang him, and he left school and his preparations for his exams, literally came running. I remember kneeling down by the train station, wailing. He stayed through my rants, tears, and only left after I slept. God bless you for me Craig, God bless you richly. And boy am I excited you scaled the exams! Proud of you baby!

By November it started dawning on me that the weight I put on in the hospital caring for my aunt wasn’t planning to ‘leave me alone’ (lol), and that was a very present worry. One day on Twitter looking through the handles of some fitness experts (if looking /watching Insanity curled up in bed with a hot drink could scare the pounds off my body I’d be anorexic by now I promise), I chanced upon an idea that became the #31Days31Writers project after I tweaked it a bit.

Amazing! Whoop! It’s one of the best things I did last year! Loved the distraction it became, and when the stories started coming in, oh what a joy! Mrs. E’ sent in an entry too, she was up on Christmas Eve! I’m excited at the Christians I’ve been exposed to and become friends with via this blog; it’s such a blessing to be part of a blossoming community of young people who love the Lord!

It wasn’t all gloom and doom though. Matter of fact, when I said I’d send in an entry, it was actually a challenge for me to find things to be grateful for.  All I had to do was think, and boom – testimony after testimony. Have time for a few?

In 2013, I was sought out on LinkedIn by the project manager of MTV’s Staying Alive Foundation to provide social media consultation for Shuga. We’re looking at bigger engagement for the project this year, and I’m proper excited about that!

In September I stood in for a friend (@Chude) at Social Media Week London, moderating a panel of people I can honestly say I wouldn’t have been able to meet all at once otherwise. Off that event, by December I had gotten two all expenses paid speaking trips for 2014. One of them is in three weeks (butterflies of life and destiny!) That event was Social Media Week in Hamburg, and God really came through for me on so many levels! There are new opportunities off that, and it’s all very exciting! 

In the same 2013, I went to bed and woke up every morning, no struggle. I traveled (and I like to move around), and there never was an evil report (except me missing a flight to Aberdeen, falling asleep on the train back home and therefore missing my stop, losing my train ticket – all in one morning, sigh). Even in that, there were funds for another ticket, strength to go back to the airport that same evening, and a safe trip to and fro. God loves me walai!

My family is healthy. Big miracle. We might have fallen ill once or twice, but we always got better. I remember crying to church one Sunday in October cos my sister sent me a photo of my nephew with bumps all over his body, suffering from a reaction to something. But, he got better, and now feeds himself! My darling boy! Boo Boo is playing football now (he’s all of 18 months, and I’m already looking for scouts for an academy! Hit me up if you know someone!)

Speaking of healing, God healed my dad of some strange, excruciating pain in his shoulder, and I couldn’t be more grateful.

I tasted love in 2013, met an awesome young man. I’m excited at the big and great things my Father has designed for me this year, for the grace and humility that led me to read books, listen/watch messages, especially in January. I’m growing (in faith and in my mind), learning about myself, amassing tips I will adapt as necessary; readying myself for the great man and home He has designed for me. And I can’t wait!

I asked God to lead me by hand this year, and not only has He been doing that (patiently, because I know I can be a piece of work), but He’s linked me with people I am accountable to, people I can openly talk to when I struggle, and not worry about anything. This is where I’m grateful for Francesca, Tomi, Wumi, and Tokunbo. Extraordinary women!

Bottomline, I’m not where I should be but ooh this year is so bright I’m excited at the things the rest of the months in the year will bring!

And so I testify today, of His goodness, and His mercy, and His grace, and His love, of His awesomeness and great glory.

I testify because there can never be a good enough explanation for God loving me the way He does, with all my flaws, imperfections and weaknesses. I can’t comprehend it (but then if I did, it wouldn’t be God na… He has to ‘show’ Himself)! Whoop!

I testify because I see 2014. Want to know what I’ve seen? I’ve seen a great year, full of peace, good news, love, hearing from and speaking to God, a complete dissociation from everything that doesn’t please Him, prosperity (oh yes, ooh yes), and immeasurable joy on every side.

This is the year, and I testify!

What are you grateful for? Share!

 

 

“Loyalty makes a friend family” – Nonso’s up for our Christmas special! #31days31writers

I met Nonso in April, after we’d chatted, Skyped, BBmed, Ruzzled, and probably sent a million messages to each other from the first LinkedIn message one awfully cold day in February. Awesome guy. Hot ‘school’ head, and a brilliant photographer too. Tried to teach me but there’s only so much my brain can carry abeg, happy to just ooh and ahh at the really great photos he takes. Have a look here.

Had to be special, today’s Christmas day! Before you gorge yourself on whatever feast you’ve laid out, here’s Nonso for the 25th day of my #31Days31Writers project!

I am Nonso Obi. I am a Nigerian, although many people don’t believe I am (I supposedly look South African). I am a researcher in Environmental Science and a photographer. I love peace and I enjoy being happy.

Two things I learned in 2013? To never worry about the things I can’t change, and to never give up hope. I learned that it would be better to pray more about everything. 2013 was a challenging year; I took a bold step with my academics and struggled a bit with my finances. However, I learnt new skills in research and photography and I met a lot of wonderful people. Gotta be grateful for that.

I am grateful for family. I didn’t say family and friends because I consider my true friends to be family – loyalty makes a friend family, and my family has been awesome. They’ve stood by me through everything; even when I took wrong turns they were there to support me. I am especially thankful for ‘ Ada Obosi’ who taught me a lot and has been a true inspiration.

One thing I would do differently would be to guard myself a bit better. I’ve learnt that sometimes I am too nice and it is not a good thing, at least not all the time. I am making adjustments already – so please don’t take this as being not nice.

Happy holidays!

Nice!

NOT SO SOCIAL ARE WE?

Facebook Features (Photo credit: stoneysteiner)

Originally posted on @SOluwatobi’s website, this is one of the guest posts I’ve done. Follow @chiomachuka on Twitter so you don’t miss out on any more ‘free guest post’ offers!!

Sometime last year, my mom called to tell me I’d lost my uncle; was a terrible time for me especially since I’d seen him only a week before.  May his soul rest in peace, amen.

A friend of mine lost her dad around the same time; somehow her cousins found out before her and because she was the closest to him and the most emotional, everyone was scared of telling her. One of her ‘brilliant’ cousins wrote this on her Facebook wall; “hey coz!! Sorry about the death of your dad, he was my favourite uncle.”

This was the first thing that popped into my head when @SOluwatobi got in touch about highlighting some of the errors we make in our use of social media/platforms. Whether professionally, security related, or just because we are human beings with a modicum of common sense, ladies and gentlemen, some things are not just acceptable! I’ll focus on personal uses in this first post, and then we’ll deal with business uses in the second part. Also, I’ll focus only on Facebook and Twitter for both parts.

So you’ve signed up, gotten yourself a Facebook or Twitter account in 2012. To start with, where have you been? Lol. Secondly, I hope that by reading this piece you can avoid some mistakes older users have made.

A little definition: Facebook and Twitter are some of the channels/enablers/tools under the broader term, ‘social media’. Social media in itself is simply communication enabled by technology. So it is talking to your friend in the market/school/church/mosque, only online rather than in person, via a letter or over the phone. It is also making new friends that way too, instead of writing and asking to be pen pals.

It is important to remember this simple analogy in our everyday use of these networks because it will help us not to alienate people in the name of being ‘social’. Especially when we’re not sending private messages. For example, would you write on a notice board at your university that you had the best sex ever with xyz? Even if the board asked you what was on your mind? Or would you say you’d just received payment for a job done running into millions of naira and you were on the way to cash the cheque? And for good measure, write where you were at the time?  If you said (or thought) yes to any of the questions, you can stop reading now. But if you thought it absurd, why do we post such things online? In these days of heightened crime and insecurity, why do we put ourselves out there like this?

Back to the story I shared earlier, would you inform your cousin of a death in the family by pasting the information on the notice board in your community centre? So why do we do these things and appear really insensitive? Social networks are not much different from real life! Really!

While I agree that we are all different, have different levels of openness et al, I think we should apply some self-censorship to our interactions on social networks. That’s it.

Personally, I always assume anyone can read the things I put online. ‘Anyone’ could range from my folks, peers, a present/potential employer, to thieves, perverts, or even law enforcement agents. Therefore, while I have a lot of fun with the accounts I own, I’m careful too.

You might say, ‘but it’s my account, why will people care what I put out? Think of it like this; a post functions like you’re talking to 50 friends in a room, only that everything you’re saying that they can hear, all their friends can hear as well. And the friends of your friend’s friends can hear too. Does that make you want to be a tad more thoughtful?

There have been countless cases of people losing jobs, getting in trouble with the law, or even getting harmed because they put out too much information about themselves and their activities. These things should be examples we learn from; pitfalls to avoid.

Same thing goes for the pictures we put up. Dear friends, the world has shrunk considerably thanks to the internet. With the tentacles of social media sinking into our daily activities, it’s shrunk even more! That picture of you in a compromising position that attracts a few measly followers on Twitter today will surface tomorrow when a potential employer searches for you on Google. #EnoughSaid

General rule of thumb? Let’s take a few seconds to think of the immediate and future effects of the things we post online; if the cons outweigh the pros, consider sending a private message to the person(s) directly involved or shelve the ideal altogether.

P: S – @SOluwatobi; I’m sorry this is late.

Related articles

• Bridging the Gap with Social Media (blogs.constantcontact.com)
• Three Core Characteristics of Good Social Media Managers (dreamgrow.com)
• You Don’t Have to Be Everybody’s Friend: How to Balance Public, Private, and Social Media (community.constantcontact.com)
• Social Media (truthwheel.wordpress.com)